Next thing you know you catch ‘em lightin’ firecrackers in their teeth and playin’ chicken.” One minute they make you so proud of ‘em you cain’t hardly stand it. “These kids of mine … I swear, sometimes I feel like a daddy and other times I feel more like a chimp handler on a Tarzan movie,” Roy said. Roy does love to recount the antics of his kids. And, of course, Lateesha’s dog, Bon Jovi. It is a great pleasure to share the state fair adventures of the Mercer clan, especially Roy, his wife Sharon Gene, son Raymond, and step-daughter Lateesha. Lucky for us, our friend Roy keeps himself a little journal to document his colorful life. The stars all align with great weather for football, fishing and fair going – it’s a redneck triple score! The State Fair comes through in the fall, and it’s a magical time of year for so many in the double-wide community. There’s family, there’s fishing, and there’s the State Fair! Mercer is best known for his colorful phone calls and threats of ass whuppin’s and pop knots, but people who really know Roy realize there’s more to him than misunderstandings. For some reason it’s kindy like real divorce, except when you’re fishin’ in Divorce Creek, after your bait’s dead, the fish’ll finally quit bitin’. was tellin’ me how he was draggin’ brim the size of truck batteries from down there off the middle finger of Divorce Creek. They’ve got them a singin’ group called End Stink.Īnd yesterday, I’s havin’ a cup a coffee and a maple log down there to C.C. Caught two mud cats and then had to come in cause of all the drizzlin’. It means “brave who gathers many leaves.” Went down there and run Doyle’s trotlines.

Got to talkin’ and me and him ended up down there on Lake Hershey-Squirta. Then Wednesday, I went over to Cousin Doyle’s house to get his share of the money we’re collectin’ to send Mammaw Upshaw to a Winston Cup race next year for her 70th birthday. Caught three or four bass big as a Sunday newspaper down there on nothin’ but BBQ Corn Nuts that had soaked overnight in buttermilk. Now he’s down here tryin’ to train a bunch of fightin’ gamecocks.ĭone perdy good at his pond. And then he went up north for a while and had some kindy fight with the Irish up there. Lou’s the little wirey old feller that used to have the hogs down there. Went down to a pond on Lou Smoltz’s place. First time I got out was back on – I know it weren’t Monday ‘cause that was the day Bon Jovi ate one of the neighbor’s Guinea hens and spent the afternoon howlin’ tryin’ to pass all the feathers. Got out and fished a time or two this week. She started buyin’ them generic cigarettes about two months ago and savin’ the extry money so she could get on that mechanical claw and win us enough turquoise jack-knives to give all the nieces and nephews for Christmas. Last year she got so big from the weight she gained down there she made the punkin on her Halloween sweatshirt look like a nectarine.Īnd Lateesha’s gettin’ ready for the fair, too. Tryin’ to shed her a few pounds off before the fair starts next weekend. Now she’s down to just two in-between-meal snacks. Speakin’ of Sharon Gene, she’s been a-fastin’ this week. Gets 57 channels, but for some reason all of ‘em are Fox. It’s one me and Raymond pieced together out of the guts of an old dish and one of the 57 triple-D fiberglass cups Sharon Gene wears under her chest protecter when she’s umpin’ softball. Well, actually, it ain’t a real store bought one. All in all I’d say we had us a good week. We’s doin’ the best we can with what we got, I reckon. Something ‘bout, “It’s a mighty good life when you gotta good wife that’s honeycured.” Heard a great new song on the radio today. We pulled all his Fair observations together and created a small book for a quick read. Roy also takes a few notes about major events in his life, like the coming of the State Fair every fall. It started as an attempt to keep track of all the many secret fishing holes and bait recipes he discovered over the years.

Lucky for us, Roy keeps a little journal just for himself. As anyone who has ever lived in or near a trailer park can tell you, the State Fair is a big event and it requires plenty of planning and not a little fundraising to properly celebrate the fair!

Mercer’s latest book is all about the State Fair.

Funny prank calls roy d mercer